March 27, 2009

From:  Colonel James F. Keathley, Superintendent

To:  All Missouri Highway Patrol Officers

Subject  :  Domestic Terrorism Watch List

Reference:  “The Modern Militia Movement” dated February 20, 2009 Memorandum

  After receiving numerous telephone calls from many MHPOs and other law enforcement officers expressing concerns regarding the implications of targeting vehicles with conservative bumper stickers, I hereby rescind the former directive.  Unfortunately, “The Modern Militia Movement” directive was written in response to DHS intelligence reports issued by DHS Secretary Janet Napolitano which suggested ultra-conservatives were to be considered suspicious and dangerous.  There were obviously too many political overtones as well as numerous anti-Constitution implications.  

  The reality is that when you’re out there alone and end-up in a gun battle with a criminal, the odds are that the only citizens who will stop to help you and even willing to return fire to protect you will be those with a Ron Paul, Sarah Palin and/or NRA bumper sticker.  Those who won’t stop to help you will have Obama, Stop Global Warming and/or Support Gay Marriage bumper stickers; they may even have decals of polar bears or dolphins on their rear windows.

  The only cautionary note that I would be comfortable issuing is the fact that those motorists who have conservative bumper stickers on their vehicles are probably armed and very proficient in the use of firearms.  Most are active military and/or law enforcement personnel or veterans.  Others may be staunch Constitutionalists who are hunters or target-shooters.  All will be taxpayers and most will be God-fearing citizens.  Therefore, I advise that you treat these individuals with the utmost respect.

On the reverse, the forces most hostile toward the citizens and law enforcement efforts of the United States of America, and to the Constitution, are environmentalists, gays, pro-abortion, anti-gun, pro-cloning, pro-euthanasia, pro-embryonic stem research and supporters of national health care.  Motorists whose vehicles bear bumper stickers or decals advocating the aforementioned destruction of America's social values should be considered by all law enforcement personnel as mentally deranged and possibly dangerous.  They may be armed with tent stakes or college text books from liberal arts schools.

I apologize to all MHPOs and other law enforcement professionals for issuing the former directive.  I hope the former directive didn't cause any unnecessary angst or inconvenience.   

Vehicles bearing Ron Paul 2012 or Sarah Palin 2012 bumper stickers will be permitted to park on MHP property.  You may put these stickers back on your private vehicle if you are so compelled.  NRA and GOA bumper stickers are also acceptable.

Remember: Do it to them before they do it to us and those who support us.

Colonel James F. Keathley

Superintendent, MHP